Vertigo: Vol 1, Issue 1

Dear Eddies,

I have the rock hair like the Eddies,
the rock pants, the rock shirt, and the
rock shoes.
Am I missing something ?

Woooh Nelllyyy!
Brian Craig
Chicago, III.

Dear Brian,

   You're missing plenty, pal ! Our
"Swirling Eddie Junk Pile" order form
will get you on the right track to being
the 'Eddie Freak' you were born to
be. Order the "Swirling Eddies Tooth
Paste" and you'll not only have the
rock hair, the rock pants, the rock
shirt, and the rock shoes, but you'll
have the rock breath too !

Hey Eddies !,

Your album "Let's Spin" is totally
awesome ! My whole family enjoys it.
In fact, my dad is so into it he hasn't
quit spinning now for three months.
He's lost his job, and my mom and I
are a little concerned. What should
we do ?

Help !
Jessy Carol
Little Rock, Ark.

Dear Jessy,

   Your father is suffering from a dis-
ease called C.O.T.F. (Currys on the
Floor). The best remedy for C.O.T.F
.is soothing gentle music. For Swirling
Eddies C.O.T.F. however, a certain
kind of gentle music is needed,
namely Swirling Eddies music ! In our
order form you can order the cas-
sette tape entitled"Swirling Eddies
Mellow". The same songs found on
"Let's Spin" are on this tape, however
each song has been rearranged into
mellow, relaxing instrumental tracks
guaranteed to calm the savage beast !
Don't delay- at $6.00 plus shipping
and handling , you can't afford not to
help your father. We want him to be-
come a productive citizen again ! -Ed.

MEET....
GENE POOL

Gene Pool is the first
of a long line of test
tube babies, gestated
in the third series of
xanthum oxide com-

pounds (chewing gum rust).
When he was a young boy of two, living
in Hoboken,Gene won first place in a
national "name that germ" contest. He
was awarded a lifetime supply of speci-
men jars and an electric guitar. His gui-
tar playing was soon good enough to
prompt Camarillo into drafting Gene
into the Swirling Eddies. Pool's fluid
style of guitar playing has earned him
the nickname "Slime Ball" and when
he's really cookin' before a live audi-
ence, Gene has been known to leave
glistening snail like tracks on the stage
floor.
Gene makes his home in the swamp-
not by or near the swamp, but actually
in the swamp! The Eddies are planning
several live appearances at Sea World
this year where Gene's gill-like ap-
pendages will allow him to do some
amazing aquatic nicks, adding an excit-
ing dimension to the band's live act.

SPOT LIGHT ON
"SPOT"

Little is known
about the man
called, simply,
"Spot" and he,
perhaps, will al-
ways remain an

enigma to the rest of the members of the
Swirling Eddies as well as the fans. A
reclusive man of few words,Spot re-
fuses to talk about his past,hinting only
that "Ruth Buzzy was and still is a big
part of it".That's all anyone knows.

BUT SERIOUSLY
FOLKS........
"So I come back to where I began, to
that other king, one Jesus; to the
Christian notion that man's efforts to
make himself personally and collec-
tively happy in earthly terms are
doomed to failure. He must indeed, as
Christ said, be born again, be a new
man or he is nothing. So at least I have
concluded having failed to find in past
experience, present dilemmas, and fu-
ture expectations any alternate propo-
sition. As far as I am concerned, it is
Christ or nothing".

Malcolm Muggridge

"Jesus Rediscovered"

"Let's have a Burger Bash!"

NEXT ISSUE...

You won't want to miss
our next exciting newsletter!
You'll meet our final three Ed-
dies- Arthur Fhardy, Berger Roy
Al, and Hort Elvison, and you'll
learn how you can win a tele-
phone call from your favorite
Eddie , along with an exciting
dinner for two at a luxurious
Macdonalds restaurant near
you! Stay tuned..........

EDDIES CONCERT
INFO..........
Look for the Swirling
Eddie's live concert at
a Universe near
you!!!!!
Details Forthcoming.

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